I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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