That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Randomize