Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
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