Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
You've changed since you got that strap on
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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