just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
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