white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Even the bartender felt bad for me
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
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