ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
