The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
she smelled like a LAN party
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.