Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
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