She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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