her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
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I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
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I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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