would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I will pee on everything he values.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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