That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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