just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
The air was thick with penises
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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