At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize