two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
