I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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