so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize