i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I have aggressive nipples.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
