You work out of a Hotel?
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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