you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
