It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
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They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
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my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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