The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
So here I am, sexting at work.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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