All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
How external is "for external use only"?
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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