I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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