so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
well you can't waste a boner
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Randomize
