make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
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he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
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Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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