That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
