I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize