yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
