So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
