bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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