Old men and throwing up are my life now.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
