i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Randomize
