white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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