It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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