bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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