I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Is it because I queefed?
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
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