I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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