I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
