Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Randomize