The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
