Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I'm always down for nudity.
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