super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
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