I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
