I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Randomize
