I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Where is the hickey?
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
