she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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