found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize