we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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