I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I think people are normalizing furries
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
