How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
