he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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